THE REVELATION
Beartooth first graced my ears on an Apple Music genius shuffle with the song In Between, I immediately fell in love with Caleb Shomo’s choral clean vocals and static-sounding screams. This band had everything I loved, riffs and drum beats that played with time signatures and rhythm (my ADHD loves this!), clever lyrics to chant with Shomo and girthy growls to let out my adult angst! I didn’t read much into the lyrics and sang along in blissful ignorance.
Fast forward to 2026 and Beartooth have released a new album, Pure Ecstasy, a far cry from the title Disgusting the record through which I’d discovered the band. Why am I bringing this up? Unless you’ve been hiding under a rock for the last few months, you’ll have seen Shomo plastered all over the internet, the subject of cruel jokes and high acclaim in probably equal measure. His crime? Becoming himself. Caleb Shomo, the lead singer of Beartooth has “come out” of his cage, speaking candidly about the process of understanding and accepting his sexuality… and looking retrospectively at Beartooth’s discography, it’s about fucking time!
Pure Ecstasy is probably the bravest album release of any artist, I don’t know of any other that covers such a broad spectrum and quite frankly, a whole soul awakening to being FREE. This isn’t just a happy record, this is someone’s courage and strife, a musical journal of discovery and I’m singing with Beartooth every step of the way!
If this album is Caleb’s Road to Damascus, his revelation isn’t about finding God; it’s about seeing HIMSELF clearly, perhaps for the first time, without shame standing in the way.
BEHIND THE CROSS
The album cover itself is a powerful piece of the puzzle in its own right. What we can assume is Caleb’s eye, a window to the soul, beautifully made up but bedazzled as though crying and his expression does not strike me as a happy one. This alone would say so much but we are peering through a cross shaped window which obscures most of his face - a very powerful metaphor for the oppression he has openly discussed during his journey. A crack runs right through the heart of the image, is it Caleb broken or the system and beliefs that surround him? His internal struggle in picture form, is he hiding behind religion and pleasing others by hiding himself or did religion force him into the shadows, trying to get out? Is he trapped or hiding?
After listening to the lyrics across the entire album, the struggle between finding himself and facing religious ideals that he has grown up into is plain to see. There are questions here for those around him, for God and perhaps most importantly of all… for himself: how can someone be born into a belief system and still be expected to change so fundamental to who they are? How do you reconcile yourself with something you’ve been taught brings shame within the very church that raised you?
PRAY IT AWAY
Religious imagery doesn’t just appear once or twice on Pure Ecstasy; it stalks the album throughout, Caleb even referencing this overwhelming battle to run and hide, it appears as a very physical entity. God, shame, judgement, and salvation repeatedly bleed into Shomo’s search for himself. Some of those conversations feel confrontational, as though he’s asking why he was made this way, leaving him downright angry. Other times he appears to almost pray, plead, beg… almost as though he’s still trying to work out what he believes and what is his true final form or what that even looks like - if there is such a thing. The more I listened, the more I scribbled down religious and biblical references until I realised the list itself was making the point. They’re everywhere, put your headphones on and find them for yourself.
THE LOAF AND THE JORDAN FISH
WHY Jordan Fish? I mean why not, ex BMTH and a talented song writer and producer is enough of a reason, right? He didn’t just put his usual talent with music into this album, listening to Caleb speak about Jordan, his involvement feels far more important than just a working relationship.
This is the FIRST album Caleb didn’t build entirely alone. Hearing him speak in previous interviews online it seems as though Beartooth was his safe place to show up and tell the truth about how he was feeling, no matter how difficult those emotions could be and without explanation or apology. He refers to Jordan as the band’s North Star, symbolically helping them through an arduous journey to enlightenment. I cannot begin to imagine how hard it will have been to THINK about what Caleb Shomo has been through, let alone telling someone about it and then finding the words to put that into a song!
If any song sums up this journey, it’s Free which Jordan helped Caleb to write after hours of hangouts and deep conversations at Caleb’s place. Jordan shone a light into the dark, making Caleb feel less afraid and ultimately became the catalyst that has allowed Caleb to finally express who he is and ultimately to come out publicly.
Sonically you can hear Fish throughout this album with electronics, atmosphere, contrast and kick ass choruses we can all chant to at shows! My favourite track “Sorry” which you’d be forgiven for thinking was an apology until you hear that feral fry scream of IM NOT a few seconds in… I LOVE this. Beartooth haven’t lost any of their brutal aggression musically but Fish’s polishing has made this shine even more.
Challenging without shutting Caleb down, Jordan has has done far more than help to create a really good set of songs. I certainly am excited to see more of these two as a collab and I hope this won’t be Beartooth’s final feast with Jordan Fish!
Fish gives us stadiums and Beartooth cave the fucking floor in!
EYES CLOSED, WIDE OPEN
Even before listening to Pure Ecstasy, reading the track list felt like following signposts through Shomo’s journey. The titles are a story in themself; Eyes Closed, Beautiful Again, Free, Sorry, Lose You To Find Me, For Me By Me, finally landing on I MADE IT. These feel like very real chapters of Shomo’s journey and it isn’t all a good vibes, highlight reel! It is DIFFICULT to hear some of the themes at times but this is why, for me, this album is so important. Coming out isn’t some linear one size fits all process, let alone when you’ve had such a close relationship with religion at the same time. There is REAL hardship and loss… for me what makes this album so important is that it doesn’t pretend coming out is all sunshine and roses, particularly when your identity has collided so violently with the religion you were raised around. There is hardship here and REAL loss… BUT alongside this there is an enormous sense of release. By the time we land on I Made It, it almost feels like the answer to everything that came before. He fucking made it and it says it on the tin!
EYES CLOSED
What a song to begin unpacking this journey when we’re talking about seeing yourself clearly and unblinkered for the first time. The irony and play on words is very clever. This isn’t a song about ignorance; it’s about being exhausted by trying to find an answer.
Looking towards heaven, seeking forgiveness, questioning whether he’s wrong, whether he’s fallen. Is there a sign somewhere that will explain all of this? Eventually it lands on an almost: FUCK IT, close your eyes and LIVE!
Is he asking God for forgiveness or asking why he should even need to ask for forgiveness at all? He seems to describe himself as “fallen”, maybe from expectations to be the person religion expected him to be.
There’s a prayer like quality to the quieter part of this song that feels like genuine pleading. Instruments drop away and we are left with something that sounds like sad desperation, asking for guidance.
Eyes Closed lives in the contrast between not wanting to see who he really is, not wanting to keep looking for God’s answer and finally being done with waiting for permission. “I’m closing my eyes and fucking living.”
BEAUTIFUL AGAIN
Again the contrast between the title and the song is in your face; how do you learn to see yourself as beautiful when you’ve spent years being taught that a fundamental part of you isn’t?
It’s not a happy “I’ve come out, I’m beautiful again, YIPPEE!’ It sounds incredibly painful; there’s knowledge without acceptance. He can aknowledge his sexuality without LIKING it. Realisation doesn’t equal self acceptance.
I hear anger here, some of it seemingly directed inwards at having believed those teachings alongside the recognition that he was a child and those beliefs were given to him at a young age before he could truly explore and interrogate them.
I felt really sad and moved listening to Caleb talk so candidly about his thoughts and experiences in this song, knowing who you are doesn’t automatically equal self love.
Musically that ugly inner monologue is paired with something very beautiful. Shomo’s melodies and vocals are very vulnerable, dropping to a whisper in places. This isn’t a song that needs to shout to hurt; some of it’s quietest moments hit the hardest. This song IS beautiful and somehow that makes hearing the uglinessof what he’s going through even harder to hear.
Maybe, being beautiful again starts at believing you were never ugly to begin with.
FREE
What is Caleb trying to become free FROM? Religion? Shame? other people’s expectations? HIMSELF?
What does freedom look like for him? Being able to love? Exist Openly? Stop apologising? Actually ENJOY his life?
Free feels like his journey towards freedom happening within the song itself. The verses carry the weight of him getting there, before an almost audible exhale of relief as Shomo finally steps into himself. Looking retrospectively at how choked he felt by expectation, there is pure RELIEF at it finally being out in the open, whatever consequences might come with it. It’s almost as though he can’t quite believe it’s happening. By that final scream, every emotion seems to come out at once, he sounds SPENT! Exhausted…. but FREE!
Maybe that’s the whole point, becoming free and HEALING from what kept you trapped are not the same thing.
SORRY
If Free is being finally out then Sorry is the “Now what? What did this cost me… and why the FUCK should I apologise?”
Coming out doesn’t mean everyone around you is going to react the way you want them to. It doesn’t instantly undo religious trauma and it does NOT guarantee immediate acceptance. Not even from YOURSELF!
Calling this song Sorry is a very clever pisstake, within seconds he shouts I’M NOT! this undeniable confidence and PRIDE is downright sexy! If Free is the exhale then Sorry is what happens when Caleb catches his breath again and it’s an angry and repeated FUCK YOU!
Sorry is probably the closest song to the title of my piece, Caleb’s Road to Damascus. His revelation: I don’t need to apologise for who I am.
He doesn’t receive A new faith, he receives new faith in HIMSELF. Understanding who HE is, seeing HIMSELF clearly.
Even the opening feels loaded with meaning. There’s a strong flavour of Sexual Healing - Marvin Gaye which feels almost TOO perfect for a song about Shomo beginning to OWN his sexuality. Then Beartooth promtly tear that softness apart with FIERCE growls and filthy breakdowns. YUMMY! The verses flip into this almost poppy, Britney-esque melody. He’s the badass bitch he wants to be and he’s completely UNAPOLOGETIC about it! The chorus? I can’t stop singing it! There’s something infectious about the refusal to apologise. Even removed from Caleb’s specific experience, I find myself borrowing some of the confidence for my own life!
Who is Sorry addressed to? God? the Church, Family, Himself? Maybe even all of the above. I hear a combination of outward and inward anger here. Underneath all of that bravado there’s still fear, grief, vulnerability. A soul laid bare.
LOSE YOU TO FIND ME
Who is the YOU he has to lose to find himself?
After Sorry’s confidence LYTFM feels like the bill arriving. Finding yourself can mean losing something, or someone, that mattered ENORMOUSLY!
YOU could be a physical person. family relationships. It could be God, faith or the version of them he once knew. It could even be Caleb himself, the version he constructed purely to survive. To me, this loss doesn’t feel entirely external.
Choosing yourself can be the right thing to do but it can still fucking HURT.
Loss doesn’t mean someone is bad, there doesn’t need to be a villain. Sometimes two things simply just can’t exist TOGETHER anymore.
This song talks about suppressing his true self, fighting himself to appease others and how difficult that was to do, the sad yet hopeful realisation he can’t do it anymore. “maybe there’s something more?”
If Sorry is not apologising for being himself then LYTFM is the reminder that becoming yourself can come at a cost.
YOU
It feels like clever sequencing that we see YOU appear after Lose YOU To Find Me, is this the YOU we’re talking about? Who he has to leave behind in himself?
Despite the MANY death references, I don’t hear this as destroying the “old Caleb”. To me, this is acknowledging that THAT version of himself can’t come with him.
“I can’t go back” this is irreversibility. He can be frightened and vascillate between yes/no, he can ask for more time, he can grieve what he’s leaving,… but he can’t UNKNOW himself!
Talking about locked doors, it feels to me as though he’s taken that metaphorical run through the door and he can’t go back to who he was even if he WANTED to. The heightening tension and sheer panic of HERE GOES NOTHING builds with him, heavy guitars adding pressure as he’s about to “JUMP” into the unknown.
“Fuck! Okay, here goes nothing…”
FOR ME BY ME
This song is a declaration of independence and honestly, it suits him!
The questions of previous songs, the panic and sadness has disappeared and here he is, THE REAL CALEB SHOMO. SEXY AS FUCK!
You closes the door on the version of himself that couldn’t come with him and here he is in full fucking colour, answering the question of who he is when he’s not performing to please everyone else. A rebirth into himself, emerging for the first time.
Vocally, Caleb sounds like he’s flirting with us and enjoying his sexuality rather than fearing and defending it. YOU GO, KING!!! It sounds good on you!!!
If Caleb were a WWE wrestler, this would be his entrance music. It sounds like he’s about to walk into the ring as his new self and take someone the fuck OUT! I’m SO here for it!
Maybe “counterfeit love” describes being loved for someone he didn’t feel he truly was before. Whatever it’s intended meaning, there’s something unmistakable REAL about the Caleb we here now… and take it from me… I FUCKING LOVE IT!
I MADE IT
Well guys, he fucking made it!!!
Through qusestioning, bargaining, grieving, apologising and then very deliberately NOT apologising! It feels as though he’s at the top of the mountain, FINALLY looking around and realising HE’S STILL HERE!
It’s almost desbelief, Pure Ectsasy has asked whether he can reconcile his faith, his sexuality and the person he was raised to believe he SHOULD be. The answer isn’t a huge theological revelation… he’s alive, he’s himself. Maybe, just maybe, THAT IS ENOUGH!
Faith hasn’t disappeared from the story, he’s still praying, hoping, still having conversations with God. He isn’t simply rejecting who he once was and pretending that version didn’t exist. His question now seems to have changed from “how can I be this person and still be worthy?” to “why would being this person make me unworthy in the first place?”
THAT brings me straight back to Road to Damascus; he FINALLY realises he doesn’t need to become somebody else.
It’s not a neat ribbon tied package of happily ever after, it seems like genuine disbelief that he has survived, like someone emerging from some enormous internal battle, looking at himself in the light and realising: HOLY SHIT, IM STILL HERE!
Eyes closed at the start, WIDE. FUCKING. OPEN. by the end.
SALVATION?
There’s a question mark in this header, why? He hasn’t necessarily found it in a religious sense… he’s found HIMSELF.
The album, probably intentionally, leaves Caleb Shomo’s relationship with religion NOW unspoken. The ecstasy appears to be happiness, freedom, relief, authenticity, survival and the relief in not having to hide himself… even from himself!
Caleb Shomo appears to have been “saved” by coming out, his relationship with Jordan Fish allowing him somewhere safe to write and to put it simply, finally telling the truth!
Maybe in the album artwork as I relook at it post listening, he’s actually not trapped but BREAKING THROUGH!
Listening back to previous Beartooth albums, retrospectively they feel like this has been bubbling beneath the surface for as far back as the band being formed. This isn’t something new Caleb has been going through, with hindsight, it feels as though this battle has been waging its war on him for a very long time.
Queer kids listening to this album aren’t being provided with as sugar coated version of this journey, quite the opposite at times, but if they can take one thing away from this and Caleb Shomo it’s that there is hope and there is freedom in living as your true self despite the fear and uncertainty. HE MADE IT, SO CAN YOU.
I have listened to and loved Caleb and Beartooth for a long time but why did I feel emplored to write this huge bloody article about Pure Ecstasy? On the surface I am an PRIDE guild member on twitch as an ally… deeply though, personally, I have never in my life heard someone speak so honestly about a journey that holds such importance to so many and that is FUCKING BRAVE.
Maybe it has alienated some of the less open to the downright homophobic “fans” of Beartooth… I say cut the wheat from the fucking chaff, anyone with half a brain can see what a brave step this is.
The Road to Damascus doesn’t always end with finding God.
Sometimes it ends with FINALLY finding yourself.
IF THIS ARTICLE BROUGHT UP ANYTHING FOR YOU
Pure Ecstasy talks about suicide, religious trauma, shame and LGBTQ+ identity. If any of those themes resonated with you, these organisations offer support.
SAMARITANS UK/IRELAND
24/7 support if you’re struggling, overwhelmed or having thoughts of suicide
https://www.samaritans.org
Switchboard LGBT+ Helpline
Confidential support for LGBTQ+ people about identity, coming out, relationships, religion or anything else
https://www.switchboard.lgbt
OneBodyOneFaith
A UK Christian LGBTQ+ charity supporting people navigating faith and sexuality together
https://www.onebodyonefaith.org.uk
Mind
Information and support for anxiety, depression, trauma and finding mental health help in the UK
https://www.mind.org.uk
If you’ve seen yourself anywhere in this album, whether through Caleb’s story, religious trauma, questions around sexuality or simply the feeling of finally learning who you are, I hope you know that you DO NOT have to navigate that journey alone.